by David Tiesma on Monday, December 17, 2012 at 10:35pm ·
If you have read much of my writings, it won't take too long before you bump into the fact that I am a follower of Jesus Christ. Yup, I grew up in the church and it has shaped much of the man I am today, both the good and the bad. However, my life has been turned on its head the last few years. Much of this is due to poor choices that I have made. It isn't all bad, many good things have happened as well. But it has been the difficult things that have forced me to re-examine so many of the things I thought I knew "for sure".
I was raised in a solid, "Bible believing" church. I learned a lot there and much of that information was foundational to me. Years ago I would have been more than happy to engage you in a conversation regarding religion, but I didn't know much about spirituality. I thought I did, but I was wrong. Much of what I learned were the things I needed to do to be a good Christian. The things I needed to do to be spiritual and earn God's favor. And then life started poking holes and forcing me to take another look at beliefs I had held for most of my life.
Examples? How and why we do church, The rapture, what it means to be a follower of Christ, how non-believers view believers, how often to attend church, and the reason for this writing- the best way for people to come to know God. And the worst way.
Let me reiterate something I wrote a few weeks ago on Facebook. I think that anytime somebody draws closer to God it is always a good thing. God uses whatever he wants to use. Nothing is off limits to him. I have heard of people finding him (or better put, he found them) while they were on LSD, while they were drunk, partying and all other sorts of ways that wouldn't have fit very nicely into the tidy theology I held tightly to in my idealistic youth. Funny how often real experiences can dismantle untested beliefs. I have always told my kids that until you struggle with your faith, it isn't really yours. And here is a quick aside: if you go to a church that does nothing but re-affirm all the beliefs you already have, you are probably in the wrong church. When you leave every week and are even more sure that everything you believe is more right than ever, you aren't growing. You are hardening into religious concrete. You don't really want God to jackhammer you out of that. Cause he will. He loves you too much to leave you there. But you won't like it. This is partly why some Christians are the most miserable people you will ever meet. They have a form of godliness but none of the power of joy and transformation and wisdom. They have a formula and the will be damned if they will let anyone challenge their beliefs. To do so feels scary. They think you are criticizing God. They feel like they would lose themselves if even part of their carefully constructed belief system turned out to be erroneous.
People, please listen. Truth is NOT fragile. God is much more interested in the holiness and salvation than you could ever be. Truth is eternal. You don't have to shelter your children from every "wordly" thing. There is much truth out in the world that doesn't necessarily cloak itself in the guise of the church or Christianity. If you don't let your children see it, they will find it later. And they will be angered that you hid it from them. Sadly, so very many of our youth walk away from their faith disillusioned when they find out that the walls that surrounded them, meaning to protect them, were made of fear, misinformation and old prejudices. And so they walk away from the faith of their parents, because it was never truly theirs to begin with. Their faith is tucked away in their minds, left behind like the toys from their youth. They outgrow a faith that never changes. One that is never challenged, for it has no strength.
But I digress.
Please allow me to preface my next comments a little more. I am profoundly grateful for many of the things I learned and for many of the experiences I had at the church where I grew up. But I also had much to unlearn.
Every service ended the same way. Actually, almost EVERY service went exactly the same way. It was almost maddening in it's mechanical precision.
Music playing when you walk in. (Praise music of course)
Opening with a welcome
Announcement
Offering- with the choir singing when those were popular in the 80's, more of a solo in the 90's
Praise and Worship- anywhere from 25-40 minutes, depending on whether the "spirit was flowing" or not- this was a contested matter from service to service. If the spirit didn't flow, it was often blamed on the worship team, the style of music, the lead singer or the song choices. Or the pastor would end the singing too early, thusly "quenching the Spirit". Some of you might think I am making up some of this. Others of you know exactly what I am talking about.
THE SERMON- the highlight of the service- the teaching, anywhere from 40-60 minutes. Anywhere from mind numbingly boring to incredibly inspirational.
And finally, after about an hour and a half, the reason for my writings today:
The altar call. This could last from anywhere from 10-30 minutes.
Seriously.
Now, some of you don't really know what an altar call is, so I shall explain briefly. In every good church service (or so I used to believe) the pastor would give an invitation for people to start a relationship with God. In the church of my youth, the pastor would speak in low compelling tones at the end of the service. Urging, sometimes pleading people to become aware of God pulling at them. He would then (almost always) ask people to close their eyes, because he wanted to respect their privacy as this was a private moment before the person and God.
Problem one. This was a lie so, so many times. You will see why in a second.
The speaker would then ask all those who didn't have a relationship with God and wanted one, those who could feel God in the room, to silently raise their hands. The reasons for this were varied:
So God can see your hand. (cause apparently he can't see in your heart and mind in that moment that you desire this)
So the pastor can see your hand and pray for you
Because it makes your decision more concrete.
Not in every church, and not always, but- a reason they normally don't tell you...
So somebody can count the hands. Because it will be up on a board in the hallway the following week.
Some of you are horrified reading that and others can't imagine why you wouldn't do that.
The speaker than asks those who raised their hands to stand. And to come forward. (Hence the implied lie that was so often told earlier in the altar call- this is private)
Once the people have come to the front of the church, they are asked to recite a prayer. The speaker says a few lines and the entire congregation is asked to repeat them, along with those who have gathered at the front. After this speak and response prayer, the speaker gets all the people to cheer and clap for those who have just found religion. In their own distinct flavor. Those who have gone up front usually find themselves surrounded by a bunch of "Prayer Partners". These would consist of a bunch of well meaning, seasoned and trusted people in the church to help guide these newly saved souls gently into the arms of Jesus. And then, in our church at that time, everyone at the front would be ushered out of the sanctuary and into a completely separate room.
There have been many, many people who have started their relationship with God today. And many see that as a wonderful, warm experience. And there are many others who found it to be a bewildering, embarrassing, deceptive experience. And rightly so. For both of them.
Where to begin...
The key of the altar call is to bring unbelievers into a relationship with the God who created them, loves them and dies for them. I still contend that that is a fabulous thing. I shudder to think where I would be without my reliance on God. It has saved me in more ways than one.
But when done in a way so fraught with problems. It seems like the worst possible way to meet God.
1. When you get into the psychology of how large groups work, there is a lot of power in the mob mindset. I genuinely believe that most of the speakers I have heard had (mostly) pure intentions. But they know how to speak to a crowd. They know how to work a crowd. This has been happening since the beginning of time. Some people are just more simple to manipulate in a group. The speaker is gifted in how to use volume, vocal inflection and word choice to sway the congregation. And they do. I have even been in services where the speaker has asked this "If you noticed somebody beside you raising their hand, please help them to come up here." So often the speaker would beg and plead and threaten and frighten those still sitting there. Especially if nobody raised their hands. Then he would pray against the enemy for deceiving the minds of those who were resisting. At times there would be talk of hell and eternal destinations and what happened when you resisted the tug of God.
As if this was their absolute last chance to ever meet God.
Remember, who is more concerned with a person's salvation? Do you really believe that if somebody didn't raise their hand in that ONE service that God was going to turn his back on somebody? Is it possible this was what was really happening? Extremely unlikely.
And some of this would be more palatable without the next reason.
2. A sign of Success. I used to be a pastor. Twice actually. I wasn't very good at it. In churches that operate this way, the amount of people that respond are a sign of effectiveness. This sounds innocent enough on the surface, doesn't it? But when you dig as little deeper, the implications are scary. Even though it has waned a bit in light of all the scandals over the last 20 years, pastors and priests still hold much sway over a lot of people. Store that away for now. Also, churches cost a lot of money to run. Especially big ones. Don't ever be mistaken, churches are businesses. They have to be. You will hear that they are trusting in God for their finances. They trust he will bring in the needed funds. But Jesus doesn't sign the bills.
Yes, I believe God provides. Tons of Scripture for that.
But if we are trusting God so much, why are we having building and fund raising and debt reducing campaigns where we devote an entire services to them? And then we mention them every service afterwards? And send home DVD's explaining the importance of giving?
Here is the dirty "secret" that is hiding in plain sight. Pastors need tithers. They need people to give. Otherwise the lights don't stay on, they can't pay their staff and ultimately, they lose their jobs. Their title. Their power.
The pastor knows that only a percentage will give, so the more people in the pews, the better chance giving will go up.
You are foolish if you think pastors don't think, talk and strategize about this. The conversation is enfolded with spiritual words: God's will, his providence, his provision, how getting people to give is good for them- they will get greater blessings if they do.
But it is often so tainted.
More hands going up means more Christians. More people responding means the pastor was effective. More people means more givers. Which means more money.
I am not saying every pastor has this in the front of their minds when they give altar calls. Some do, I suspect. But almost every pastor would rather have a lot of hands go up than a few. And MOST of the motivation is for the right reason. Hopefully there are even some where ALL the motivation is always 100% pure. But when your very job, your livelihood is judged on how many people "get saved" every week??
Let's put it this way. Do you get more accolades and more money when YOU produce more at work?
Of course you do. And please remember that pastors are just people. Same need for praise and accolades. Same need to be praised for their accomplishments. Maybe even more so. But that is a subject worthy of it's own separate writing.
3. It isn't scriptural. I am not a biblical scholar by any stretch of the imagination, but I have read through it a few different times. I do not remember ever reading of altar calls anywhere. Ok. I concede that this is my weakest point so far. There are many things we do differently now. Cultures change and we have to adjust our tactics. The truth never changes but the presentation of it should. Paul taught us that quite clearly in some of his epistles. With the regularity this happens in some churches, you would think it would be all throughout the gospels. With the veracity it is defended, surely it is Scriptural, right? It just isn't there. It has become routine.
4. It can feed an unhealthy view pastor's have of their own power and importance. There was a story my old senior pastor used to tell when he was asked why he always gave altar calls. When he was a younger pastor, he was speaking at a revival service. There were a few teenagers there that he noticed in the crowd. One was obviously really listening to the message but his friends weren't. For reasons I forget, he didn't give an altar call that night. The teenagers left, he never talked to them and tragically they were killed in a car accident leaving the service. From that point on he felt like he was always supposed to have altar calls.
On the surface, this makes some sense. But you don't have to dig very deep before your shovel hits some dangerous perspectives and motivations. There is a subtle arrogance under this. To reference the point I made earlier, who is most concerned about a person's salvation? Not a pastor. Not a parent.
Do you really mean to tell me that God is going to put somebody's eternal destination in the hands of one man? "Sorry you're in hell, kid. Remember that pastor that you were listening to right before you died? Well, if he would have been listening to God, he would have given an altar call. You would have had no choice but to respond because his message was just that good. You would have gotten saved and would be in heaven right now. Bummer, huh? Better luck next time. Oh wait. There is no next time."
Ludicrous.
Can you imagine living under that shame? For all those years? Puts a little bit of new light on the whole motivation piece, doesn't it?
Perhaps many pastors do a great job of stripping the financial part of people responding to altar calls. But factor in this as a driving factor and what do you get?
You know that there are non-believers in any given service. Statistically there are more in a bigger church. If you don't see hands... It could mean more people going to hell. Which can mean that pastors will try whatever they can think of to get people to respond. Almost anything is justified because it could mean somebody's eternal destination! Now THAT'S pressure.
If this is the worst way to come to start a relationship with God, what is the best? Relationship. You get to know somebody. Really get to know them. You let them get to know you. You share life. You discuss things like faith and belief and doubt and pain. You share how you have handled and continue to deal with the tough issues in life. You be real. Be open. Be vulnerable. Admit to what you don't know or understand.
God will let you know what to say and when to say it. I highly doubt you are the only voice in their life. This should be the most natural thing in the world. Perhaps it shouldn't be that different than a real birth in some ways. It should be private. Happening with the people in this world that are closer to you than any other. Of course you don't really need doctors or nurses there... it's not a perfect analogy.
But it shouldn't be so incredibly artificial. Stilted. Weird.
Seriously. Take the 50,000 foot view of the whole process. if it seems normal to you it's because you grew up in it.
Have you ever heard of a birth happening before hundreds of people?
If you want to have a relationship with God, I am thrilled. If you want to talk to me about it, I would love to have that conversation.
5. It's a cop out for believers.
"Listen Mr. Unbeliever, I would like you to have a relationship with God. it's really awesome and has completely changed my life. Now listen, all you have to do is come to church with me! We will sit in this big room with 500 other people you don't know. There will be some stuff going on that will probably make you uncomfortable, but just bear with me. Hopefully we sing the right songs and the pastor is "on" the morning you attend. You will listen to a complete stranger tell you how to live a better life. At the end, he will give all you sinners the chance to start a relationship with God. You raise your hand, go up front with a bunch of other people (hopefully). He will then have you repeat the magic words and BAM! You are good to go."
One of the biggest problems with the church is that we get some of the scriptures backwards. We are called to be in the world but not of it. Instead the church has mostly been of the world but not in it.
If you are a believer and don't have friendships with people outside of the church, with non-believers, what the hell are you doing?
Please don't go out and try to "make friends" so you can get them saved. Or so you can invite them to church. Most of them don't want to go to church with you. And for valid reasons. Maybe some day they will get there. Maybe not. God will sort that out. He doesn't really need your help. BUT- he chooses to include you. Because it can be a beautiful thing to speak life into somebody elses existence. He wants to use you. The hard part is that it takes time. It can get messy. Will get messy. Just like your life is. And you might not ever be privileged enough to see them officially "come to faith".
Another thing to remember- God has already started wooing them to himself. It's what he does. And he is far better at it than you are. It's not all up to you. But if you are fortunate and listening, He WILL use you. Even if you are not a great communicator. HE probably prefers to use people who aren't good communicators because more words rarely help anything. (said the guy writing the 1000 word essay)
6. It can do more harm than good. Picture it. you have attended a church service. Something completely unexpected happened. You responded to an invitation to get to know God. Something in the message, in the service really hit you. Before you know it, you have prayed a prayer, blurted your life out to a complete stranger in a little back room and left with a handful of brochures in a folder. You saw a lot of smiling people and were heartily congratulated. And then what?
You go home.
The rest of the day you are still trying to figure out what was going on. You feel like it is a good thing, probably. Religion has worked for other people, right? You just don't want to be a weirdo about it.
Then you wake up the next morning and almost have a religious hangover. Did I really do that? Hoo boy. You live your life. It's the same life. You don't get magically promoted. Your mother still has cancer.
If you are lucky you get a call a few days later. They are just checking in. Seeing if the whole God thing "stuck". Most never hear anything else.
When somebody tries to talk to you about God in the future, you dismiss it. See, you tried the whole "God thing" and it just didn't work for you.
Certainly this is not everybody's experience. I know people who got "saved" at an altar call and still have a vibrant, healthy relationship with God. But it happens far more than altar call advocates would like to believe. Because that is another problem in the church. We aren't honest about a lot of things. Don't believe me? Ever had a pastor leave the church because "God was leading them in a different direction" only to find out months later that the senior pastor and him had a shouting match?
Or ever attend a church event that was a huge disappointment in terms of attendance or the way it played out? They talk about it at the next service and talk about what a "wonderful, blessed event" it was?
Uh, excuse me? Were we at the same event? Cause the one I was at was a train wreck.
It can be difficult to have real, honest conversations in the church. To present contrary, healthy arguments about how and why certain things are done. Way too often in churches, to challenge the status quo id to be un-spiritual. Don't be surprised if you are labeled as a rebel. And we all know that rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft after all. Salem witch trial much?
It is easier to pretend everything is great. Easier to let the pastor deal with the hard work of helping somebody start a relationship with God.
If we let it happen organically, through relationship, the follow up happens. You are there to answer questions. You walk beside them. When life hits hard, you help them understand how to rely on God. You explain what you have done in situations like that. Together you grow and learn. You bond and make a friendship that will probably last for years.
That is how it should work, for many different reasons. It is the best way.
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